Recoiling From Pain Intensifies It

Recoiling from pain is futile.  For me, trying to do so actually makes it worse.  It significantly intensifies it.

This goes for any kind of pain--physical, emotional, mental or spiritual.  But in this instance, I am referring to physical pain--the kind that brings deep suffering on every level of existence.

Part of the problem is that I unconsciously resist pain.  This is an automatic and very unconscious response from me.  I don't like feeling pain.  Resisting it always comes first for me.  

In the resistance, I begin tensing up my muscles and my joints in some kind of unconscious effort to brace myself to surmount and bear the pain.

It is not easy to stay conscious and aware that I am in pain avoidance mode. Usually I discover it when I am feeling even more pain and I do a "body check," and I realize that my entire body is now into the resistance of the experience.

It is completely natural to want to avoid things that feel so uncomfortable.

A total mind-blower to me is my discovery that by mentally directing my attention into the center of the pain, facing it, focusing on it, allowing it and accepting it, alters it in a positive way for me.  

This seems very illogical to me.  But I am here to tell you that sometimes it is the only thing that brings relief.

Perhaps the relief comes from not adding the extra tensing and anxiety to the already difficult experience to bear.

I am not sure.  But I know that for me, relief is in the heart of the pain.  That doesn't necessarily mean that acceptance and allowing makes it go completely away.  But it surely does bring some peace and liberation from the depths of the suffering.

Try it!  What have you got to lose?  Maybe some pain!!

Love and Hugs,
Barbara

© Copyright 2009-2015, Transformation Of A Mystic | Barbara F. Manning. 

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Exhausted and Trusting

I am whooped beyond my understanding.  It does not make any sense that I could get so very depleted and from such little exertion.

But it is what is, for now. 

I used to have such high energy.  But I have over-expended it many, many times, too.  I miss all the energy I had in my past!  Boy, do I miss that a bunch!

The pattern for me lately is that I get myself back into an energy flow and then...WHAM, it all drains out of me like someone pulled the plug on my energy tank.

I've got things I want to do.  I've got places I want to go.  I want to have the energy to do these things.  

It is hard to be patient with myself!

But I do not have energy--not this minute, anyway.

It is alright.

There is a Phoenix in me, readying to be reborn.  I've seen this pattern in me before.  It is not easy to trust this process.  But it is always the truth that I do rise up out of the ashes.

I will again.

For now, I will Trust...

Love, Hugs & Blessings,
Barbara

© Copyright 2009-2013, Transformation Of A Mystic | Barbara F. Manning. 

All Rights Reserved

Thank you Google Images for the Commercial Reuse of your Images!

The Morning After

I always want to blog about positive things.  I want to be a voice for higher vibrational living.  But some days I am in a great deal of pain.  Sharing this part of my journey is equally as important as sharing all the fun stuff.  And hopefully it will help another find their way through the, often lonely, sometimes bewildering and difficult path through chronic pain.  

There is a way through.  I do it regularly.  It is not fun, but I can attest to the fact that it can be a very growing, enlightening and inspiring experience.  In fact, it can sometimes be the very reason for a person to be on the spiritual path, learning to transform very difficult things into positive and helpful things.

It takes whatever it takes.  All roads lead to the same place.  I can do it peacefully and with positive intention, no matter my personal circumstances, or I can cause myself great discomfort--additional and unnecessary discomfort.   

I had such a wonderful time with my family yesterday, and the days before that, gathering supplies and doing prep work to do the Valentine's Day project and dinner with them!
  
The mornings of the day after Project Days I do can sometimes be very challenging for me.

I always try my very best to pace myself.  It is something I used to not do very well at all.  I have been beaten into submission about this.  (Translated--I have beaten myself into submission by, in the past, doing whatever I felt like, regardless of the consequences I knew would likely occur the next day if I pushed myself so hard.)

But sometimes, regardless of how well I plan and space out my work or myself, I still end up feeling like I've been run over by a Mack Truck the next day.

This is one of those days.

For me, chronic pain is about deep aching all over the place to the point of distraction.  My hands hurt, my lower back feels like it is going to give out and is shooting pain down my legs, my left foot/ankle is numb and feels like it is going to spasm and turn over.  My shoulders and upper arms and upper back are aching.  I am throbbing and aching at the core of my being nearly everywhere. 

I feel like I have been beaten with a 2" x 4" board.

Is it arthritis?  Is it the end results of multiple back surgeries and hand surgeries?  It is Fibromyalgia?  Am I just nuts?

Who knows!?!  Maybe it is all of these things. 

I have physical pain every day of my life.  It is the degree of pain that differs.

It is what I do with it and about it that makes the difference in my life. 

I have always been a very physically active person.  I love being very active!  But my body surely recoils greatly at times these days!  It has been like this for me since the last spinal fusion surgery I had in 2003.  I just never recovered from that surgery. 

I could get really depressed about this.

I could get really angry with myself about this and be a real grump with everyone, too.
 

I will take the day today, and just hang out by myself.  I will look for the gift in this pain and aching.  I will take a really long, hot shower.  That always helps relieve the aching some.  I will meditate.  I will do energy healing work for me and be as quiet and as peaceful as possible.

Surrendering to what is going on in my body, my mind and my spirit always makes things so much easier and better for me!

The intensity of feelings always pass eventually.  Fighting only makes the experience stay longer and/or hurt more.  So I will honor it, honor me and honor the process. 

 
I surely enjoyed myself with my family yesterday!  It was worth it!  They are worth it!  I will also spend the day today, remembering all the fun I had with them yesterday!

Love & Hugs & Blessings,
Barbara

Thank you Google Images for the Commercial Reuse of your images

© Copyright 2009-2013, Transformation Of A Mystic | Barbara F. Manning. 

All Rights Reserved